Francine's Celebration of Life

Of all days to snow...but it was extremely picturesque as we drove into Vancouver to attend the services for Sharon's mum Francine. We arrived around 1:30 p.m. and already the snow had been falling steadily so the side street by the church was quite covered....still unplowed with remnants of the previous snow falls. We arrived at the same time as Mimi and Patrick so it was nice to be seated with the "school clique" since we have gotten to know them all so well over the years. The Florians and the Murray's were seated closer to the family at the front of this beautiful Our Lady of Sorrows church on South Slocan. The church was still decked out with the Christmas trees and the poinsettias...very classy with white lights and the votive candles all lit.

Two days before her death, Francine requested that she be baptized, and Tino explained to us later during the reception how that can take place without even a priest present upon one's deathbed so that one's soul may go to God via a Catholic Memorial Mass. For Sharon, this was her mother's wish so it needed to be respected and carried forth and she was relieved that alot of the preparations were taken care of by her brother. Tino's sister Rosamaria being the Principal of the parish school enabled all of this to take place at such short notice. The service began with Chantelle singing "Amazing Grace" as the family entered and were seated in their pew. This was a shortened Catholic funeral mass and only lasted for just over an hour. Sean and Andre did a reading each - when you see all the cousins together you see how strongly they resemble each other. Chantelle and Ashley read the Prayer of the Faithful. Following the service, we went up and paid our respects to the family. This was very meaningful as it gave us a chance to extend our condolences even though I had already seen Sharon, her dad and Kim prior to this.
The Celebration of Life was in an adjoning hall down the way and it was so snowy getting across the way. The kids had done so much scanning/research and they presented an incredibly beautiful powerpoint tribute to their grandmother. Ashley and Sean took turns speaking, giving her Francine's biography and then they turned it over to the computer...opening with
"The Prayer" (love this song) and photo after photo we went through the 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s as her life unfolded infront of us. The clothes, the hairstyles, the family as it grew, the friends, the life with her smiling face in the centre of each and every image. There was not a dry eye in the house...it was a phenomenal presentation that can be copied and saved for posterity.
The food that was catered was awesome...it would have made Francine so happy because she was the Queen of Parties, good food and wine, Sharon has followed in her footsteps. I had a couple of glasses of wine, one with Sharon at our table and we ended up staying until 6:00 p.m. with the usual crowd. It is too bad that sometimes it takes a sad occasion to see people that we should see more often like Sue/Mario, Tim/Tara, Trish/John from our Trivia fun...and Lisa/Greg. There was just so much food, incredible Italian deli style salads, meats, cheeses, and I didn't even get to desserts seeing how I am supposed to be back on track with my WW points.
It has been a big day for the Burke family and they have yet to have this all sink in, I think that they will congregate at the family home and regroup tonight. Karen is here for a week so the family can take advantage of being together (minus the Australian cousins) and find comfort now that this day is over. Tino had me aside again and he says that if he feels Sharon needs me, he will find a way of letting me know...I was very touched and the emotion caught me...I will always be there for anyone whenever and if ever they need me.
When you attend a funeral service or I would rather it be called a celebration of life...it makes you think and wonder about your own mortality and you question what in your life there is to celebrate...and how your passing will be recognized by your family and friends. At our table, we jokingly talked about what a mess our photo collections are and how would anyone find anything to put together as a presentation and what the heck would they say about us in our deaths. Perhaps, we need to start a file folder and start placing in photos that we wish to have people see because heaven forbid if a chubby one goes up there of me stuffing my face with Purdy's chocolates goes up!!!
Does your family intuitively know you so well that they can put together your life? I wonder when I go if from my vantage point I can look down and hear and see everything they are saying...or will it even matter? Will my family know that I love light pink roses and not hot pink ones? And if I should go when the Lilacs are in bloom I want bunches and bunches of Lilacs all around?
We are heading into a time now when we will be visiting death more...aging parents, parents of friends, and illness/disease striking when least expected. I don't often think of death but perhaps I need to ponder upon the concept more.
The snow continues to fall this Saturday evening...my last weekend before its back to work....I am ready to go back now and let 2009 unfold...and I pray that our life moves into a positive direction and let 2008 fall to the wayside. It was our 44th (bad luck!) year and now that I am 45 it can only get better.